i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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