I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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