: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
