Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
