she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize