so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Randomize
