Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
