Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
