420 ftw
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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