Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
