too bad you live with your parents still
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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