Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
But theres a keg here and me gusta
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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