just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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