Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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