Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
