her vagine was all disorganized.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Randomize
