You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
