32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
