I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
