69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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