too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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