he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize