I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
