He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
