Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize