how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Can I color on your dick again?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Randomize