how can u be prego again
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize