u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
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