She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
