Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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