I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
