That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
There r osticjed everywhere
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize
