She's JV to your varsity
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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