Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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