I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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