the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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