you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Randomize