Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize