this just has baby written all over it
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Come on in and take your pants off
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