I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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