i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize