he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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