It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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