I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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