You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
