i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
