lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Randomize
