is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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