brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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