Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
