I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
