It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
How's work?
Spinning.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
