Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
