walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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