i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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